I’m afraid this blog has the potential to come across as an outlet for self-pity. And I really don’t want to come across as a martyr. That’s not what I’m trying to do. Social media is filled with the happiest moments of people’s lives, which is great. But I’m trying to show the other side of things. I’m trying to share the real side of life. Initially I though this might be a good medium to advocate for IBD patients. But I’ve come to learn that it really is about advocating for everyone. We ALL come with a story of pain, or struggle or heartache. And I want to share mine in an attempt to be genuine and sincere.
” I don’t know how you deal with this.”
“I complain so much and this is what you’re dealing with.”
“You’re so strong.”
“I can’t imagine going through what you have.”
These are some of the all the very kind words I hear from friends, family members, nurses or strangers. And although they are nice to hear and I am forever appreciative, I must stop them and remind them that we are all human, and we all have our own shit to deal with.
I quickly learned the importance of a good support system. At first I really struggled with the idea of inconveniencing others. I know that at a staff meeting my boss doesn’t mind ordering me a different meal because I can’t eat pizza. But I minded asking. My best friend understands when I say I can’t go to the Junos with her. But I cringed at the thought of breaking the news. My Dad enjoys watching the basketball game on a tiny old TV in the hospital because he’s with me. But I know a big screen and recliner are nicer. And my mom is okay when I charge the hospital Wi-Fi to her visa… Well I was actually okay with that too. But one of the biggest things I learned was to give people more credit. This is what they are here for. If your friends and family cant bring you bags of 2-ply toilet paper then who else can? I don’t know if there is any other disease that is more vulnerable than Crohn’s or Colitis but when your support system says they don’t mind helping you in some way, believe them. Be selfish.